Am I a fool?

Was it love, or just something that reminded me of
Something that felt a lot like, but wasn't, love
Just friends, friends then, until the end
You know I still pretend, just friends.

Take a step and come out of the shade
I can tell you're no longer afraid
I'm helpless without your warming smile
Take a step and come out in the sun
I can tell it's already begun
I'm helpless without your warming smile

Was it love, I think it was but I'm far from sure
I'd never felt that way before, was it love?
Just friends, am I a fool to be asking for,
a fool to wish that we could be more than friends

Take a step and come out of the shade
I can tell you're no longer afraid
I'm helpless without your warming smile
Take a step and come out here in the sun
I can tell it's already begun
I'm helpless without you,
Helpless without you,
Helpless without your warming smile
Your warming smile

This is pretty much how I feel. I'm helpless without that warming smile...I can still remember all this little things. And it's really just been a wonderful time but as it's always been I seem to be a fool to wish that we could be more than just friends. Why am I so utterly stupid??!
I don't wanna feel like this I can tell. It's just awful to have those thoughts in your head all the time...but I can't do anything about it anymore. It's gone way too far to stop.
But what shall I do? I could just try to pretend I'm fine and go on like I do. That would work for some days and weeks and afterwards I'm just a shadow of who I am..
I could tell it to you...I could just give you my heart to read. I could lay all those thoughts and feelings flat before you. But as I would do that I might lose you as a friend too...
What else? I could give it to Jesus...but this means waiting, doing nothing...hoping...

It was you who picked the pieces up
When I was a broken soul
And then glued me back together
Returned to me what others stole

I don't wanna hurt you
I don't wanna make you sway
Like I know I've done before
I will not do it anymore
I've always been a dreamer
I've had my head among the clouds
Now that I'm coming down
Won't you be my solid ground?

I look at you and see a friend
I hope that's what you wanna be
Are we back now where it all began
Have you finally forgiven me?

You gathered my dreams in
When they all blew away
And then tricked them back into me
You saved me I was almost dead

This song I sing for you Jesus..it's not my own but I like it. And I think it's pretty much like that. There's noone else who could be my solid ground. I cannot expect any human to be my solid ground...
And You were the one who picked up the broken pieces of my soul and dreams and You told me to never stop dreaming again! Never stop living again...and I won't, Jesus, I won't give up. I love you. Please just help me with all this stuff....please.