its about my heart

First of all God wants our hearts not our service.
He wants us to give Him our deepest wishes and thoughts. He wants to be with us when were remembering the darkest parties of our past just as well as He wants us to share our greatest memories with Him. Hes so loving that it breaks His heart everytime that we just cannot give Him all we are and have.
He doesnt want us to DO something in the first place...I cannot love people outta myself. First of all I need to be so full of love that I just cannot return to my old being but do whatever Jesus would have done.
Im realizing how much Hes already changed me and my heart but Im realizing that I wont ever be perfect in my life here on earth...I wont ever be pure here on earth and I wont ever be as full as He wants me to be. Cause His love is neverending. I couldnt stand to see this neverending, this pure love from face to face as long as Im here on earth.
That would have frustrated me months ago...and it still isnt great to know that this journey wont end until He comes back. But Im realizing that as Im not going to be perfect Ive all the time to just be loved by Him. And its all about his pure love...I want to come back to Him and Him alone day by day. I wanna have a close relationship with Him...so that I can grow up to be whatever He wants me to be.
There's no need to be the best human on earth...cause He just wants my heart. He knows what I think before Ive thought it...and when Im trying to pretend He knows it eventhough Im trying not to show.
I wont ever be the best in everything I do...but I am loved.
And I will keep on telling me that He loves me day by day...cause I need to hear it. I need to hear that He wont ever let go of me and that He yearns to love me.
And now Im gonna go to work...and its not about me doing the stuff its about God changing me. And He IS changing me... maybe you cant see it but I know my heart and I know that it is changing.